You thought your day couldn’t get any better after learning the project at work, well, worked, and the your brother’s wife is having another little one. And as you walk through the door, there sits the prettiest orchid you’ve ever seen, placed perfectly in the middle of the kitchen table. He’s surprised you once again, with not only a flower but a note: Would you go on a date with me tonight?
No, this isn’t the guy who saw you across the room at church. This isn’t a man who’s been weirdly stalking you the last few weeks. This is your husband you’ve been married to for almost 10 years, and he’s asking you on a date! It’s not weird, awkward, or out of forgiveness for something y’all argued about the night before. But it’s his usual way of showing how much he loves you, and if you asked artist, mother, and wife of 3, Plumb, it’s out of necessity of any marriage:
“Make sure you always have date nights!!” ~Plumb, 13 years of marriage
It may be a simple thought, but it’s something that actually has substance to any marriage. A chance to reconnect, to relax, and to really get to know each other away from everything around you as a couple (yes, even the children). “But Nikki, I have 2 kids under 5 years old! We can’t go out on date.” This is an excuse that will get you into a LOT of trouble as a married couple, leading to never having moments to enjoy each other, even when the kids get older, and then awkwardness when the kids are finally out of the house. I’ve witnessed it far too often: the couple sent their final child out to college, and all of a sudden Friday nights are in the house, with weird silence and no loving sparks flickering around. My parents at one point had 3 KIDS under the age of 5, we’re living on one income (a very low-middle class income to be exact), and still took the time once a month to go out, just the 2 of them, with us left in the caring hands of our next-door neighbors. What’s awesome is now, with how the economy is, more and more babysitters are available, some of them friends from church who sometimes do it for no cost if it can help you out–just ask!
“But Nikki, we never have the same schedule.” That is what vacation hours are for. Be persistent in asking for maybe a few hours off to catch-up with the one you love. If not and maybe the only time you see each other is before heading to bed, that’s what bedroom door locks are for. Make a late night snack for the two of you, have some music playing in the background, and catch-up in the quiet of your bedroom, even maybe giving yourself some time to watch a movie or play a card game (Phase 10 or Skipbo are always fun).
Whatever you do, whatever excuse you have, try your hardest to put it on the back-burner at least once a month, or even once every 2 weeks if possible. Your marriage will be blessed by a little date time for you two, and your kids will see a happier, healthier idea of what Christian Marital love can truly be!
What are some in-home date night ideas you’ve had? Comment below if you’d like!